Soul Less

He said he saw me souless
Like I was caught with my pants down
No under-
Where my mind was he could not
Never
Fathom
As I breathed my defense:
"I never had one to begin with"
How dare you
Walk in on me like this
And for the first time
(make it the last)
I felt shamed
To find myself lacking
When others clearly fed
My cabinets are EMPTY
I cant even keep bread
To HOUSE you
My undoing lingers overhead
Your warning
Was their warnings
Many a mother wailed mournings
For sons never recovered from my surgical endeavors
The cuts made clean
My scalpel never wavers
And forever was really the end of us and they
And. You've. Seen. Me.
With all your mundane hate
Your barrier-our difference
Harbors between my legs
I give birth everytime your eyes
Claimed my maidenhead
Verbal bastards emerged from our marriage bed
My feminine clock ticked
For obligations to be met
And I felt
(the last time)
That I could pay this debt
But The piper was never real
Just your trick to lure me in
And. I. Am.
SOULLESS.
Panties on the floor
Hot underneath these fluorescents
My heartbeat a noiseless clamor
For the life of me
For the life ended in me
I cannot do the math
My specialty is subtraction
But this test demands I add
To you
But I can't.
The cost of a free fuck
Was more than my check.
And I am broke now
Forever in my mind's debt
God forgives
But the devil will never let me forget
He saw me Soul Less.


-Nox Falls